At least people don’t like you only for your looks! said a member from Yuusk.com
It would be dreadfully trying to be strikingly good looking. That said, the preliminary aspects of dating—be it online or in the ‘real’ world—are heavily biased towards looks, which can put the less aesthetically endowed at a disadvantage. Here’s a guide to overcoming that initial hurdle, and successfully dating, both online and off.
Online dating tips for those with non-godlike physiques
Not gorgeous? Don’t worry. In the end, looks are only a small factor in the world of love and romance. Here are some pointers on being a great date – looks optional!
Go for an honest, but witty profile picture – Thinking about photoshopping yourself to perfection? Let’s skip that one. You’re only going to get yourself in trouble should you get to the in-person meeting stage. It’s much better to be honest with your profile picture – but be honest and fun! Show that there’s more to you than a boring person with mediocre looks—perhaps a photo of you skydiving would be fun, or a shot of you joking with a group of orphans you just saved from an erupting volcano…. you get the idea.
Don’t say too much right away – A great way to scare people off online is to bare your soul too early in the game. Feel free to be honest about yourself and share fun details, but leave some things left to be discovered later – a little air of mystery can be a good thing.
Don’t be too judgmental – You’re not the only one in a vulnerable state on online dating sites. Be kind and patient, but also be fair to those who approach you and don’t lead people on if you’re not interested.
You’re not as disadvantaged as you might think!
You might not be gorgeous, but that can actually be a good thing in the long run. Here are five reasons why it pays off to not be strikingly attractive:
You will find it easier to cultivate and be appreciated for other talents
Even talented beautiful people have to battle with a sort of stigma- in this case, it’s the stigma of being attractive. All too often, people let that one facet of attractive people’s personas be an all-encompassing trait, and this can hinder the appreciation of more important talents. As you’re not burdened by particularly distracting attractiveness, you’re free to be appreciated for your intelligence, wit, and other favorable (and ultimately, more important) qualities.
You will find it easier to be humble and more understanding
You might not be beautiful or handsome, but at least you’re not conceited about your looks, right? Nothing is more insufferable than a date who thinks he or she is the best thing that ever happened to planet earth.
You will not experience the pain of losing your beauty
One thing I experience quite frequently in biographies, memoirs, and other tales from beautiful people, especially women, is an account of how painful it is to age and lose one’s beauty. If you’re not known for your beauty, or particularly attached to your looks, you won’t have to endure the suffering associated with losing them!
You have the advantage of differentiation, and can be more memorable
It is well understood that humans favour the norm, and value more normal appearances as more beautiful. This is understandable enough- we are all attracted to to that which is familiar. Nevertheless, looking different (and therefore less attractive) can still be leveraged to one’s advantage. Looking different allows one to stand out, be memorable, and make an impact. If you look different, stop feeling self conscious and utilise your uniqueness to make an extra impact. Just think of all the famous and influential people in history who were known for odd or unique features- they rode their singularity to success; why don’t you?
You are given a good challenge which can make you ultimately stronger
I would never presume to say that life is easy for those who are not attractive- toms of studies and anecdotes alike acknowledge that being beautiful can make life easier and more enjoyable. That said, one can use a disadvantage to make one ultimately stronger, hence being less attractive only gives one the opportunity to become more clever, agile, interesting, and talented.